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When I said “How much dumber can we get?” I did NOT mean it as a challange…

Unfortunately, that particular gauntlet just got taken up.

by Louis Seagray
March 3, 2022
in Culture, Education, Government

Portland, OR — I owe all of you an apology: when I rhetorically asked a few articles ago “Exactly how much stupider can this country get?” I SINCERELY did NOT mean it as a challenge.

Gov. Kate Brown, D, Oregon signed into law Senate Bill 744 last year, which removes the requirement that graduating seniors must be able to show they can read, write, and do high school level math. I guess they didn’t have any more buildings to burn down in the name of racism.

She quietly signed the bill, hoping no one would notice; it wasn’t even made public until two weeks later. There was no signing ceremony or news release, and she has yet to make any comments on the law. Nothing to see here folks; move along.

But after some heavy nagging from some members of the media (The Oregonian; proof of their ‘racist’ ties to be announced shortly I am sure) that weren’t aware that they had to ask Democratic permission to do so, the governor finally assigned some poor grunt in her office to make a statement about it: Charles Boyle, the governor’s deputy communications director, replied in an email statement that the bill will benefit “Oregon’s Black, Latino, Latina, Latinx, Indigenous, Asian, Pacific Islander, Tribal, and students of color.” They listed every race but white-literally.

And here we go: lowering standards in the name of equality.

“If at first you don’t succeed, lower the bar.”

This is not the motto of anyone who has ever had to overcome adversity that I am aware of.

Democrats call this “fairness.”; Republicans call this “the bigotry of setting low expectations.”

This is the educational equivalent of a participation trophy (in that the highest form of effort was simply showing up.)-while it may look good on the old mantle, I suspect that the Olympic committee will be a little more hard-nosed as to what defines the “winner.”

If you had suggested this a decade ago I would have had a chuckle at your little joke. I am not smiling at all now.

What’s next on the block in the name of “equity”?

Cut off the feet of tall students?

Burkas for attractive students?

Marbles in the mouth if someone’s pronunciation is too good?

What about requirements for attendance?

If ditching reading, writing, and math standards for graduations doesn’t result in more equal graduation rates among the races of students (or even if it does), then the next logical target after all of the smiling equity honed students venture out into to the real world and get outwitted by livestock will be to get rid of racist attendance requirements-likely followed by a loosening of larceny restrictions for those that are “ethically” challenged.

I am not writing this with a smile, nor do I have any irony in my words.

This is really happening.

The kids that used to eat the glue and require us to have warnings like “CAUTION: Do Not Eat the Large Blue Mint at the Bottom of the Urinal” have grown up.

And they are now in control.

It’s possible they may get rid of the idea of “graduation” completely-kind of doubting this, as the schools seem to substitute meaningless ceremonies for mediocre achievement as opposed to actually offering a learning environment.

But, when done with school … either when the “students” (not sure which word to pick — Inmates? Servitors? Charges?) are done with their “classes” or just stop showing up … I guess students will be given an official form which says which classes they took.

It doesn’t have to be honest; if a Census form can ask what race and gender one identifies with then it’s not too hard that a Diploma could be issued that asks if you identify as “graduated,” “educated,” or “done learned.”

Perhaps more accurately, it could show which classes they were enrolled in. If a student actually showed up to the classes, or got actual grades given for those classes I doubt they would be even recorded-in the interest of not hurting the feelings of the grasshoppers that think they are entitled to all of the ants’ spoils.

In that vein, no where will the document say “graduated.” Students will just be told that they’re done with school, ‘Kthnxbye.

How long before we have to drop the bar on even that, and start changing from “mandatory number of days attended” to “hours attended?”

And the fact is that real world isn’t likely to cater to their feelings. I am an amateur scientist, and inventor. I need people who can read, write and do some math at a functioning level.

I need people who can do those things and can prove it. I am not going to be offering remedial learning programs on-the-job-because there is a good chance that someone will get killed if they don’t know the basics, that the ‘Skull-and-Crossbones’ does NOT mean “Pirate Food.”

Of course, it is no longer a joke that once Oregon public school graduates start complaining that they can’t get or keep a job, they easily might demand that the government force- or coerce-employers to hire them. And then, man, am I going to be called every vile thing under the sun for refusing to hire people who can’t perform in the name of “diversity.”

Name-call away; these guys can go get on the 747 built by the guy that won the “Most Hours Not Incarcerated” trophy. I’ll stick to the plane built by the engineers that can read blueprints and operate a CAD system. I like not having both wings on the same side.

I would note that if you want to work at a place like SpaceX, proving you can do math to the standard of building a rocket correctly is going to be pretty much required of you. I doubt they are going to give you points to “feel” your way along to what you think is the right answer- or that there’s no wrong answer if you tried your best with a pure heart.

It doesn’t matter if you “identify” with a rocket scientist; if your equations don’t balance then don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord done split ya.

Stay away from the hydrazine, stay away from the ablative heat shield, stay away from the convergent/divergent rocket nozzle bells. Heck, don’t get near the DMV registration sticker (pretty sure that the Space shuttle has one).

If you don’t know where to put the decimal point or negative sign I don’t want you anywhere near anything more complex than Ikea furniture. Which is bloody tough to do even if you CAN read.

Conversely, we could achieve the same by making it virtually impossible to legally fire-or refuse to hire- someone for incompetence.

“I was fired for being late every day, but I graduated from high school without even showing up most of the time … my boss’s expectations are too high … illegally too high … someone needs to do something.”

“What does it matter that I am not a Neuro-Surgeon? I identify with one-now get on the table. This might pinch a bit…“

“My first wife was ‘tarded. Now she’s a pilot.” Quote from Idiocracy, a movie which has tragically gone from being a comedy to a documentary.

Thought just occurred: Asian students already had the highest graduation rates, and have generally been beating the US students like a circus monkey in math, science, and a few other fields as well, just sayin’. Why do they need to be included in the polishing of the pebbles why the diamonds are being dulled?

How is eliminating math and reading proficiency make any sense in a world where low skilled jobs are getting replaced with automation, and in a country like the US where tech, biotech, energy, aerospace, medical device companies cannot hire enough engineers, software developers, research lab scientists, statisticians, robotics developers without getting them overseas a la’ H-1b Visas?

I used to look at my mother funny when she said she didn’t understand the world anymore.

Not anymore.

I am-by all accounts-a pretty bright guy (says so on my horoscope). But I don’t understand what I’m seeing or how any of this leads to good things in the upcoming years.

I didn’t say that I couldn’t see the future, however.

In fact, I am betting we all can.

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